woensdag 24 augustus 2011

well - whatever

Well, whatever. The job interview went well, or went all wrong, I don't know. I woke up this morning after a bad night of sleep, totally confused, not knowing anymore at all what I prefer in my life and most of all, if I am able (and willing) to work more then I allready do.

Well, whatever. I tought about it long enough to say "Fuck you all, we'll see what the future may bring". For now, I just want to have fun, hang out with my friends, enjoy the city I live in and most of all: rest. I am going to sleep early tonight, and think of the wonderfull weekend I had in Copenhagen. I am going to remember truly and profoundly how much fun I had, instead of occupying my head with worrying and shit. FUCK YOU ALL. Above all, I am only 24 years old, way too young to be the center of this game about expectations, goals, billable hours and bullshit. Well, FUCK YOU.

As I said, I had a wonderfull time in Copenhagen. I love that city! Most of all, I love Helene, a girl I once met, who showed me around. She opened my eyes and closed them again, for good and bad en most of all truth. We had so much fun.

Now, I'm off to work again. Well, whatever.

woensdag 10 augustus 2011

i forgot

to mention I spent the last month in Zanzibar and Tanzania. Quite a trip - a mindblowing experience. I don't feel like writing about it, but I'd love to show you some pictures!

back at work/back on track

I am happy again. Back at work, back on track. Life is good. I wear my shirt with pride and I smile quite often. I like my job. That's a first, or at least it has been a while since I tought about it that way. I eat strawberrycake for lunch and I work on files concerning green energy, the diamond industry, illegal immigrants - and I like it. It might be just for a while, and it has probably something to do with the fact that I am able to change. With that I mean, to change my job. I have a job interview at the end of next week, after that I leave for Copenhagen. Thank God I leave - again. I love leaving. Living, loving, leaving.

I'll see what I'll do. Or I stay, or I go. Should I stay or should I go? I actually think it's kind of funny. I am lucky. A very lucky girl. Where others have to fight and crawl to find a job that fits their need, I am in the position to choose. If I only liked choosing - whatever (smile). As long as you don't choose, everything remains possible (Mr. Nobody, 00:51).

I love my life and I love my little brother. He's back in town, after travelling for 6 months. I cried when he left, I smiled when he came back. I bought him a catapult, that tool you use to shoot people with rocks. He likes it. I missed him so much! Now things are back as before - we text, we meet, we laugh, we live. Last night we texted eachother at the same time, saying "check out the rainbow outside!" - isn't that funny. I am happy.

It's a bit cold at the office, but I love feeling the wind on my skin and having my window open. My heart is warm and filled with love, curiosity and joy. It's time to sail away, but in the same time it is time to enjoy the view on this mountaintop. Life goes fast. Things change easily. Life is good. For now, I feel fine.

the happiest girl in town

snapshot - Africa